Regret
by Masi-no-Ichigo
Summary: ...he already felt like he was broken from the inside out. But, strange as it seemed, Kazu couldn’t bring himself to regret being with Ikki." FINALLY IT'S UP. BL/Shounen-ai, Ikkazu IkkixKazu Teen for language


**A/N: **...OH MY IKKI. This took me waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay longer than I thought. xx;;

That's probably due to the length though. Seeing as this story is definately about TWICE the length of all my others, even my chappies of Eye of the Storm Which I'll update soon, I promise!!

BUT. Moving ooooooon This story is a present! 33333 For teh lurrrrrrrrverly Crimson Vixen CAUSE FINALS JUST PLAIN SUCK.

But gooooooodness sorry this took so long, really. I'll give you the piccie tomorroooooooooooow. 3333

But to everybody, I knooooooooow I need to work on EotS, but it's being mean right noooooow...But this is really loooong, so it'll hold you guys over, ne? 333 And also, small note; I've NEVER written stuffs like this before, so...bear with me here guys, kay? You'll see what I mean 33

**Disclaimer:** The darlings Ikki and Kazu don't belong to me...-pouts- They're Oh!Great's. 333

**Warnings:** BL, Shounen-ai, and languaaaaaaaaage. IkkixKazu, durrrrr 3333

Oh, and if you haven't read Simple Words, you wouldn't know this, but I use 'Ayaka' as Kazu's older sister, seeing as throughout the ENTIRE series they never mention it. Or at least, I never noticed. If you have, be kind and tell me 333

Masi 333

* * *

Kazu shifted slightly, his hand twisting a little in the tight grip. Ikki looked down at him, his dark eyebrows raised, and Kazu blinked up at him for a second before smiling. Ikki gave his hand a small squeeze and Kazu looked away, cheeks tinted pink. He heard a small chuckle from the Crow, which of course only made the blonde's face redder. It still felt so _strange_, though. To be with Ikki, but not just with him; _with_ him… Kazu moved again slightly, and Ikki poked him in the side; Kazu jumped quickly to the side, and Ikki laughed.

"What's up with you, man? You're so skittish," Ikki said, mouth cracked into a grin.

Kazu scowled, all prior thoughts forgotten. "I'm not skittish, you jabbed me in the side!" the blonde retorted.

Ikki pulled Kazu back to his side with their still intertwined hands. The Jet looked over at their hands, then back to the other side again, and Ikki scowled. "What?"

Kazu's blue eye's met Ikki's dark ones, and he decided against it. "…nothing." Kazu didn't need to tell Ikki what was on his mind and ruin the moment; he knew that Ikki hated the topic anyway.

"C'mon Kazu, just spit it out."

Kazu shook his head, white beanie holding the blonde locks too close to his face for them to move.

Ikki stared him down, dark eyes boring into Kazu's, who was unable to break the eye contact. "Seriously," Ikki said, turning towards Kazu. Oh, right; Ikki hated Kazu _not _talking to him more.

"It's just…I was thinking how weird this is…" Kazu nodded towards their hands, and Ikki squeezed his again. "You know; _us_."

The Crow quirked an eyebrow; "What's so weird about it?" he asked.

"Uh…well, you know…nobody would ever expect the ladies' man, Minami Itsuki, to be with a _guy_…" _Let alone me…_ "People would probably expect you to be with Simca or Ringo or somebody…"

"Why them?" Ikki's tone was serious, and Kazu's eyes flickered to the side again.

"Well…they're both really pretty, and really good riders…"

Ikki's eyebrows jumped up under his dark hair for a moment before they gathered together in the center, forming a scowl. "So that's it."

Kazu gulped. _What did I…?_

"You're just comparing yourself to others again, Kazu," the Crow said, continuing. "I don't care who's good at what, just that the person I'm with is who I _want_ to be with. You can never help that."

Kazu looked down to the side again. "But Ikki…shouldn't it matter how well they can ride though? I mean, if that person that you chose-,"

"You, you mean," Ikki cut in, brows still dangerously low.

"Fine, if _I_ were holding you back…"

"Kazu, shut up."

The blonde looked up at Ikki, startled. "What?"

Ikki's frown had turned into a glare, and Kazu flinched. "Stop fucking talking. All you say is, 'You're so much better, I need to get better to be like you.' It doesn't matter whether you're as good as me or not, I don't know whether it's even possible for you to fly in the same sky. So stop comparing yourself to _me_. You're plenty better than other people, but Kazu, we're on different roads."

Kazu slid his fingers from Ikki's and stood up quickly. "…I know that, Ikki." He tugged his hat a little lower on his face, and slid his feet into his AT's while rushing out the door. _I already know. I know that better than anyone. Know I can't catch up, know I can't stay with you…_Kazu bit his lip and moved his feet faster, not knowing his direction, but not really caring. _This_ is why he hadn't wanted to talk about it.

--

Kazu finally slowed to a halt, after who knows how long, and took in his surroundings. He was in an alley in the outskirts of town, and though it was dark, Kazu was still able to tell where he was, unfortunately; he'd been here once before. The Jet grimaced at the memory of the battle Kogarasumaru had had there only a month before. He could still remember it clearly, the blood spilled, the sharp pain of the ground smacked against his face…Kazu shuddered, and started to quickly head back to the center of town, not wanting to be there. However, as soon as the motor in his AT started to hum with speed, he heard another motor…no, more than one other motor. He spun around, and the world went blank.

* * *

Kazu gasped as a sharp pain ran across his lips and face with a sharp tug. His eyes watered as he glared at the blurred shapes in front of him, which were slowly beginning to focus. As the shape in front of him began to form, Kazu grit his teeth; he recognized the bastard. The man holding the duct-tape that had been ripped off of Kazu's mouth was sickeningly familiar; it had been only about a month since Kogarasumaru had come across the man's team. They had cheated against the teens, ambushed them, used knives, and only Ikki's quick distraction had allowed them to get away with only cuts and gashes. Kazu kept eye contact with the large man while conducting a quick check of his situation. He tried to move in small movements, only to find that his wrists had been bound to his waist in the back, and it was digging into his pale torso; His ankles also had about a foot of the thick twine binding his legs together. The jet swore inwardly; he was trapped.

He turned his focus back to the thick man above him and glared, putting as much venom into the glare as was possible; it was the only hateful gesture he could make. The tall man grinned and bent over the blonde, who immediately spit in his face. As the man stood back up to wipe it off, Kazu finally spoke; "What the hell do you want with me, Bastard?"

The older man sneered. "My name's not 'Bastard.'"

Kazu just sneered right back at the man. "Like I care," he retorted.

"My my, aren't _we_ a smart ass?" The man kicked Kazu's shin, _hard_, but Kazu bit his tounge to keep from wincing.

"What the hell do you want with me?" Kazu repeated, eyebrows still pulled together.

"Oh, we were just bored…and we couldn't ignore it when some precious little thing like you comes wandering into our territory. And by precious, do you understand what I mean?"

Kazu grit his teeth. "No."

A smirk ran across the man's face. "Oh really…? The blonde rumored to be Minami Itsuki's love interest, not precious?" Kazu's face hardened. Hadn't he and Ikki kept that a secret? _And besides…it's not like Ikki'd care anyway._

"I don't know what you're talking about."

"Oh, you don't? That's a pity…we don't care who you fuck around with, as long as you know the fucking guy." The smirk across the man's face curled into a malicious smile. He took a small knife out of his pocket; "We just want to hurt someone. Y'know, to get our _point_ across…" At the word 'point', he laid the tip against Kazu's bare arm, and ran it swiftly across. Kazu bit his lip; he couldn't, _wouldn't_, make a sound.

Suddenly, two men from the man's team appeared from what seemed like nowhere, until Kazu realized that that wasn't a wall behind the man; it was a row of people. Kazu swallowed; there went any chance of escaping. The two other men grabbed Kazu roughly, and untied his wrists and waist, only to stand him up and pin him against the wall, arms bent over his head. There were several swift _rip_-ing sounds, and Kazu felt the uncomfortable bind of the same duct tape that had been over his face earlier; one strip over each wrist and each upper arm. Kazu audibly growled as they did the same to his still bound legs, and the first man, obviously the leader of the team, sneered again. "What, is it too uncomfortable for the little princess?"

Kazu's nose wrinkled slightly when his lip twitched, and he curled the fingers on both hands to flip off his captors. The men just chuckled darkly, and the two men with the duct tape pinned even Kazu's fingers to the wall. The blonde now completely immobile, with the exception of his head, now had no choice but to glare and snarl with all his might at the men before him.

"Let's see…" The leader slowly paced before the pinned teen. "What can we do to get back at that fucking crow…?" Kazu tried to keep the same cold face while gulping; it resulted in a facial expression that caused the wall of men to laugh again. But Kazu knew what Ikki had done to piss the other team off; he and Kogarasumaru had witnessed it. Ikki had cut the man before him; he had managed to flip the knife on the offenders, slashing the leader smack dab across the chest.

"He gave me a scar…" the man said, and took the knife, already stained with crimson, making a slow, exaggerated cut on the blonde's pale skin, digging as deep down as he could. Kazu exhaled jerkily, breath full of pain, but still made no sound. "Oh, is Princess trying to be tough?" The men behind him laughed again, a little louder this time. "I remember from the last time…you like to run, don't you?"

Kazu allowed the spit in his mouth to well up before he aimed again; bull's-eye, right on the leader's left eye. The thick man growled, and his hand shot out, catching Kazu's cheek, leaving a red mark in the shape of the man's large hand. As the man wiped off his face, Kazu noticed the two cronies with the duct tape had gone. When they came back, the leader lowered his arm and glared at Kazu. "Just for that, you get the sprinters' work-out; whether you like to run or not."

Kazu's eyes widened when he saw what the man gestured to; a pair of bricks; the mahogany stone already stained with dried blood. _They wouldn't…_

The man sneered as if reading his mind. "Oh, these? These are just what we use to…_strengthen_ our guest's bodies." He took a brick in each of his large hands, and hung them limply by his sides. "But since we don't know what you like to do best, we'll just have to give you a more _full_ body work out, won't we?"

As the man raised his right arm, Kazu clenched his eyes shut and gritted his teeth. _Full body means I don't know where…_ Suddenly, Kazu felt the wind knocked out of him and also felt a sharp _crack!_ from some where in his chest. The Jet gasped at the impact, teeth bared as he tried to suck in as much air as possible, no matter how much it hurt his lungs.

"Oh, did that hurt, Precious? I'm sorry, but you can't progress with out pain." The leader moved the second brick from his left hand to his right. "Now, you can have the sprinter's work out…tell me, Princess; which of your legs are stronger?" Kazu kept his blue eyes icy and didn't respond. "Oh dear, I'll just have to guess then, won't I? It's so trouble some when the person I'm _helping_ doesn't cooperate…" The leader lifted the second brick.

"How about…the right one then?" Kazu pressed himself against the wall in a useless attempt to create _some_ distance between him and that brick. This time, the heavy _thud_ hit his upper thigh, and Kazu winced audibly, breath hitching with the pain. The leader chuckled mercilessly again. "Oh…a reaction? It's good to show your feelings, Princess; it means you're human."

The leader pulled his knife back out of his pocket and the Jet eyed it warily; he didn't think he could keep quiet with the pain after that second brick, he already felt like he was broken from the inside out. But, strange as it seemed, Kazu couldn't bring himself to regret being with Ikki. Even though he knew it was because of his connections to Ikki, however strong they were, no matter if they were weakening or not, he couldn't regret it. He couldn't regret loving him. Kazu grit his teeth, bracing himself for another slash from the knife, or another pounding from a brick, but it never came. Instead, he heard the high pitched whine of a siren. The entire team in from of him whipped their heads around in an instant, and the leader swore.

"Oh, I'm sorry, Princess, looks like we'll have to stop here; I don't think the police have such a refined taste in body building…" The two men who had duct taped Kazu to the wall then ripped the silver material from the blonde's skin, leaving thick red bands where is had once been. The taller of the two grabbed Kazu around the waist, and Kazu swore for the first time in what seemed like an eternity.

"_Fuck_, what're you doing?!" Kazu's voice was husky from his strained silence and the pain. The man didn't say a word as he carried Kazu out of the dark basement where the team resided, and he threw the blonde over his shoulder. The Jet tried to punch, batter, do _something_ to the man who was gripping him with those painfully ropey arms; however, with his legs still bound, there wasn't much that he could do. The man swung Kazu off his shoulder and onto the floor of a cold dark alley with one swift movement, and the blonde hit the ground with a _thud_ and a muffled grunt; he'd landed on the part of his chest that had been hit by the first brick. When the man's motor faded as he fled, Kazu tried to sit up against the wall, using his arms as support. Kazu sighed, and, leaning upon a small ledge next to him, he started to work away at the knot tying his legs together; it's not like there was anything else he could do.

* * *

_Ring-riiiiing, ring-riii- click._

"Hello?"

"Hey, Ayaka, is Kazu there?" Ikki pressed the cell phone to his ear. He'd given Kazu enough time to calm down, right?

"Ikki? I thought he was at your place." Kazu's sister sounded confused, and Ikki swore inwardly. _So Kazu's missing?_

"Uh…he was. But he left a while ago, and he said he didn't know if he was gonna go home or to Onigiri's, so…I'll try there." Ikki hastily made up an excuse; there was definitely _no_ need for the other rider's sister to be involved with this.

"Oh, alright. Bye, Ikki."

"Yeah, thanks. Bye." As soon as Ikki heard the click of the lines disconnecting, he pulled the phone from his ear and pressed down the two on his phone; Kazu's speed-dial.

--

Kazu started when his phone started vibrating in his pocket. _That was close…ten minutes ago, and those bastards could have picked it up._ Kazu reached for his phone and flipped it open, not even bothering to check who was calling; it was probably just Ayaka, anyway.

"…Hello?" Kazu's nose wrinkled; his voice still sounded husky. He coughed a little to the side, only to have his face fall at the reply.

"Kazu? Where the _hell_ are you?" To hear Ikki's voice, even through the phone…Kazu flinched slightly.

"I'm, uh…I'm just out for a run."

"Ayaka said that you never went home." Kazu bit his lip. He hadn't actually expected Ikki to ask his _sister_…and also the Crow's tone plainly said more than he had; there was no point in trying to lie.

"Uh…I just got a little caught up, that's all. I'm heading home soon."

"Oh? And why aren't you heading back now?" Ikki's now cold tone showed that the older boy wasn't fooled. Kazu gulped.

"Cause…my ankle was hurting." Kazu grimaced. _Like that'll work._

"…where are you?"

"What!?" Kazu's eyes widened. Either Ikki knew more than he was letting on, or would he really just come to find Kazu over something so trivial…? "No, it's fine Ikki, it's just…"

Kazu could practically see Ikki's scowl; "Kazu, I'll just find you if you don't tell me; I'm already outside."

Kazu swore softly to himself, facing away from the cell's receiver. "It's really okay. You don't need to…" Kazu spoke with his steadiest voice; he _couldn't_ let Ikki find him.

"Kazu, I don't care whether I need to or not. Just tell me where the hell you are or you'll be making me waste my time." Ikki paused for a moment. "And don't try to hide."

Kazu looked down at his bound ankles and sighed. "Uh…I'm in those alleys in the outskirts of town…I don't know which one…it's north of the town though."

When the Crow replied, his tone sounded different. And though he couldn't put his finger on it, Ikki's tone seemed almost harsher to Kazu, yet… "…and what the hell are you doing there?"

"…does it matter?"

"…not yet, at least. I'll be there in a sec."

Kazu heard the line disconnect, and slowly let out his breath. His hand dropped limply from his ear, and he snapped his phone shut. _Great…now what?_ He reached down towards the knot on his ankles to try and untie them again, only to fail for the umpteenth time that night. He sighed and leant his head back against the wall; nothing left to do but to wait.

As soon as he heard another pair of Air Trek motors, Kazu shrank back but it was no use; the boy's pale skin stuck out against the wall. He heard Ikki turn into the same alley and looked away towards the ground, blue eyes avoiding Ikki's. He heard heavy breathing; Ikki had run here…but _why_?

"Kazu…" Ikki's voice sounded strangled. "What the hell…?" Kazu looked up at him slowly, eye's still hesitant to make contact. But when the blonde finally _did_ look into Ikki's eyes, he couldn't break the eye contact. Kazu didn't know why, but there was just something in the older boy's eyes that he wanted to understand, and he couldn't bring himself to look away. He saw Ikki visibly gulp, and realized he hadn't replied.

"I, uh…got caught up." Kazu's tone was unconvincing, he knew it. But he didn't want to tell Ikki what had happened, exactly. He didn't want Ikki to know that he had been hurt because of him.

"…let's get you out of here, man." Ikki rolled over to Kazu, who had moved his eyes away again, before bending down and plucking the Jet quickly off the ground.

"Ikki…?!" Kazu held still, out of fear of being dropped, but he felt uncomfortable being held that way by the Crow. Ikki started running, arms wrapped around the smaller boy, his face determined. _But determined to do _what?_ Why does he care so much…didn't he say it himself? We're on different roads…_ Kazu's mind spun as the town rushed past, and he shifted slightly in Ikki's arms; it wasn't actually _that_ bad to be held so close to him…Kazu rested his head against Ikki's chest, suddenly exhausted.

Kazu started at the sound of Ikki's door closing; _when did we get back?_ Ikki kicked of his AT's Kazu still helplessly immobile in his arms, and quickly padded up the stairs to his room. He set Kazu on the bed, and sat down, dark eyes finally making contact with Kazu's clear blue ones.

"Seriously Kazu, what the hell happened to you?"

Kazu swallowed and looked back into Ikki's eyes, still trying to pick out that unknown emotion in those dark depths. "I, uh…just ran into another team." His voice was soft, but he didn't lie to the Crow; he couldn't lie.

"And why the hell…" Ikki sounded strangled again, and his dark eyes were partially clouded with confusion. "Why'd they do _this?_"

Kazu looked to the side. "They…we've met them before. About a month ago."

Ikki's eyes widened. "You mean…?" The Crow's dark brows furrowed. "Those bastards we fought with last month? No wonder you were there…" Ikki broke off his sentence, a trace of something different in his voice. Something like pain.

"Why…" Kazu thought out loud, but hadn't realized he'd said anything until Ikki's eyebrows raised a fraction of an inch.

"What?"

"I guess I mean…why does it matter? Why do you care who did it?" _Why do you sound so hurt…?_ Kazu didn't voice the final question; he was too afraid of Ikki's reaction.

"Of course I care, Kazu! One, I obviously want to beat up the bastard who did this to you…and two…if it was those guys, they were probably pissed at me, right? It's my fault you got hurt…"

"But I don't blame you!" Kazu nearly shouted at Ikki, who looked taken aback. "What you did to that bastard…you did it for the team."

Ikki nodded, but his dark eyes still looked clouded. "Yeah…but…" Ikki trailed off, and it was Kazu's turn to frown.

"Ikki, I don't blame you. And besides…regret doesn't look good on you." The corner of Ikki's mouth twitched up to the side a bit, and Kazu exhaled a little. "Seriously, Ikki. It's not your fault."

Ikki finally re-focused on Kazu, and he looked at the blonde with a look of determination again. "At least tell me what they did to you, exactly. Ropes, cuts…" Ikki's eyes ran over Kazu's bare torso. "What else?"

"Um…not much else really…" Kazu trailed off; he still didn't really want to tell Ikki.

"The red on your wrists and arms?"

Kazu gulped. "…duct tape."

Ikki grit his teeth. "…and your stomach?"

Kazu finally broke eye contact with the Crow and looked down to the right, hands nervously fiddling with the sheets of the bed. "Um…that was…"

Ikki scowled. "Spit it out, Kazu."

"…that was a brick." Kazu spoke quietly and recoiled slightly at Ikki's expression. The Crow looked furious, mortified, and shocked all at once, and Kazu shifted nervously.

"T-they hit you…with a fucking…_brick_?" Ikki repeated hoarsely. The larger boy gulped, and he squeezed his eyes shut. When he opened his eyes, he moved his hand to Kazu's stomach and pressed lightly on each of the blonde's ribs, one of them earning a light hiss from the blonde; it had been broken. "_Fuck_…anything else hurt?"

"Uh…just my leg…a little," he muttered. Kazu moved again, uncomfortable, and Ikki took notice.

"Stop squirming. What the hell did they do your leg?"

Kazu bit his lip before murmuring softly; "…another brick." He saw Ikki grimace, face filled with rage and…_pain_? "Ikki, I…I'm sorry."

Ikki's eyes flicked back to Kazu's. "What?"

"I'm sorry…it's my fault, for running off like that and getting caught." Kazu didn't know why Ikki had that expression on his face, but he didn't like it there. He wanted Ikki to be happy; he wanted to see Ikki smile. "It's my fault you're getting so pissed at them."

Ikki just stared at Kazu, a dumbfounded expression replacing the bitter pain he had shown earlier. "What? You think this is _your _fault? Kazu, I'm getting this pissed because…_hell_, it's because I care about you, Kazu!"

Kazu stared at Ikki. "What?"

"Hell Kazu, you think I've been with you all these years and never felt a damn thing for you? You've been my best friend for as long as I can remember, and you didn't stop to think that maybe I cared about what happens to you? I even…_we_ even ended up as _more_ than friends, and you think I don't _care_?" Ikki's eyes were fixed on Kazu's as he said this, and Kazu could only stare back. "Kazu…I meant what I said earlier. But I never got to finish; it doesn't matter what road you're on, as long as our two roads are side by side."

Kazu swallowed, eyes still stuck on the older boy. "Ikki…" Kazu trailed off. He bit his lip, looked away for a moment, and then finally fixed his blue eyes in a straight stare. "…thanks."

Ikki took a deep breath and scooted closer to Kazu, his fingers worming their way in between the Jet's. Kazu wrapped his fingers around to the back of Ikki's hands, pads of his finger fitting perfectly between each one of the Crow's knuckles. He let his head drop onto the older boy's shoulder and his eyes started to drift shut. He felt Ikki squeeze his pale fingers and smiled lightly, the corners of his mouth turning up slightly. The last conscious feelings Kazu had were the light pressure of Ikki's lips against his forehead and the calming circles of Ikki's thumb on the back of his hand before he drifted to sleep.

* * *

**A/N: **No mooooore authors notes! But I just had to mention; I'm sure there's a TONNNNNNNNNNNNNN of typos...please ignore them or point them out in a PM if something doesn't make sense, and I'll try to make sense of it. 33

Oh, and Rae-neeeeeee, I luv youuuuuu Congrats on finishing! 333


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